"Difficile est satiram non scribere." (It is difficult to not write satire.) - Juvenal

Subway tunnel Weather

Dank, with a 100% chance of trains

Home Repair Horoscopes

    Glue-Gun Accident

    Power-Staplers and Vodka Do Not Mix

   Righty-Tighty, Lefty-Oh, Crap!

    Measure twice, cut finger, swear.

    The light switch works.  Stop while you're ahead.

   Suring the week you make $50 an hour.  Today, you'll spend 30 minutes trying to fugure out a way to save $2 at Home Depot.

   I'll get to it tomorrow, I swear.

    It's supposed to be crooked, right?


Big, dumb men who undoubtedly taunted smaller, smarter kids in grade school had some kind of big, dumb contest today that nobody with any brains cares about.  It's not like it was our fault for being smart.  
Line of the Day

January 21, 2008

Obama supporter warns Clinton over 'racism'

By Tim Shipman in Greenwood, South Carolina
Last Updated: 6:18pm GMT 19/01/2008

One of Barack Obama's most fervent supporters has warned Hillary Clinton that "racist" comments by the former First Lady will deny her the support of black voters in South Carolina - the next White House battleground.

In response, Clinton's campaign released the text of an upcoming speech in South Carolina to demonstrate that no such appeals were being made.  Excerpts follow:

Dick Cheney said that in responding to terrorism we might have to go over to the Dark Side.  I reject that.  Some people find comfort in losing their morals  - they find a kind of dark ease.  I stand here against dark ease.  ...

Obama likes to brag about his experience as a community organizer in the field.  Well, he may have been a good field hand, but is that we want in the White House? ...

Democracy is about getting the hopes and dreams and realities of everyday Americans to Washington.  But the system is broken.  The system for getting real American’s experiences to Washington isn’t working.  The pipe is cracked. ....

I love South Carolina – your watermelons, your briar patches, your state flag.  Like many Southerners, I enjoy a good Coke-cola.  Barack likes coke too! ...

Barack Obama wants to encase America in bad policies.  He wants to make us slaves to bad policy for generations.  He wants to marry your daughters to a failed health-care system. ....

Come on! I’m a white woman, he’s a black man, do the math!  Forty years ago you’d have lynched him for voting, the least you can do is not vote for him.

Warning! The Line of the Day is not an authorized infotainment product! It contains material not previously cleared/authored by Karl Rove. By definition, therefore, it is a farrago of lies and pretentious word choices. Only the part in bold is stolen from actual news sources.

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