Line of the Day
Special Multi-Line Edition
October 18, 2006
NYC Mayor Bloomberg's Lexus
Carjacked in New Jersey.
The vehicle was being driven by an
employee of the mayor's when two people assaulted him and forced him
out of the car, driving off. The car was recovered, abandoned but
undamaged, a couple of hours later and seven miles away.
Mayor reported to be furious ... "this kind of violence is supposed to
be our specialty," fumes mayor. "I can't believe we're being
surpassed in the category of 'random crackhead crime' by Jersey."
He immediately ordered police patrols to be stepped down, and ordered
extra officers home to bed. "I'll show those punks who's got the
worst streets in the world if I have to start doing drive-bys
Bush Signs Detention Bill
Rove Highly Optimistic GOP will retain cotrol of Congress in elections
Two stories not related, really.
Lay Conviction Voided on Grounds the Dead Cannot be Punished
Cheney Laywers Ask if Rule Applies to Undead or Those Whose "Dessicated, lifeless hearts are buried in occult places, and whose bodies are instead animated by pure evil"...Really Just a Hypothetical, Claims Veep's Lawyer...
Line of the Day is not
an authorized infotainment
product! It contains material not previously cleared/authored by Karl
Rove. By definition, therefore, it is a farrago of lies and pretentious
word choices. Only the part in bold is stolen from actual news
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Lawyer Promoted to
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There For Karl Rove
All On Board
the Victory Express!