One-Day Champion Tom McCudden, Editor-in-Chief of the Muskrat News, was defeated on the Friday, December 10 ediposde of Jeopardy! by a software engineer from Ohio. McCudden wagered $7,000 on a Daily Double in the category of "Legal briefs," and lost. The man who beat him, Bob Bowsher of Hilliard Ohio, played an excellent game and is a nice person.
The rest of the show was an anti-climax, as McCudden spent much of the rest of the time with his head resting on the podium, stirring only occasionally to ring in and shout "What is You Stink, Alex?" After the show, McCudden refused to attribute his loss to his habit of drinking from a hip flask during the game, noting that the strategy had helped him win on the previous day. His fellow contestants described him as 'creepy,' noting that he had hogged the fruit plate in the Green Room while pretending not to speak English before taping began.
McCudden was a student at Duke law School before last night's episode aired. Administrators at the school are reported to be meeting today to decide whether to allow him to remain after missing the "Legal Briefs" clue. "It was an easy question," said Dean of Public Relations and Grounds Keeping Artie Fishel. "The clue was straightforward-- "To violate North Carolina General Statute 14-113.13(a)(2)(a), a person must falsely represent themselves as this" - and the correct response was obvious: "What is the holder of a financial transaction card, including a credit or debit card but not including telephone credit cards or similar devices covered by General Statute 14-113.8(4)." So we're very disappointed in Tom, and are considering throwing his butt out on the street."
However, sources cite such an expulsion as unlikely, since the embarrassing episode has already aired, and Duke has a tradition of never throwing a student out if they can be milked for one more semester of tuition. Also, McCudden has repeatedly embarrassed the school previously, by writing Muskrat News, "presenting a disheveled appearance" at job interviews, "making improper advances to a parking meter" and "smelling vaguely of bacon," according to his student file.
McCudden's family, meanwhile, has pretended to be supportive, while secretly initiating legal maneuvers to change their name to "Smith."
Outraged responses to this story can be e-mailed to Webmaster@muskratnews.com
Remember, Kids, the part in bold is actual 100% news-flavored media product.
The rest is the fakey part.
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(from www.tvgameshows.net, who had the sense to take it down almost immediately)
